Toxic MRAs: How to be careful of them?

While there is a big positive side to men’s human rights movement and men’s support groups like SIFF, there are serious challenges posed to the men’s movement due to negative aspects of social media like Facebook and Twitter.

There has been a lot of toxicity from time to time in these social media platforms, which leads to unnecessary arguments, infighting among men’s activists and even sabotage of campaigns or the movement itself. Some lawyers and their agents also promote or fund this toxicity by paying to fake men’s activists or some women to break the movement.

The dangers are posed by:
1) Some lawyers paying money to their agents or women to break the movement and the men’s support groups.
2) Some women and men posing as men’s activists in social media, while secretly working for feminism and using men’s rights platforms to earn name, fame or awards for themselves.
3) These negative elements also try to promote infighting inside the movement, encouraging new male victims to damage serious men’s activists or men’s organizations.
4) These fake men’s activists seek power, money or awards and they are ruthlessly competitive against any genuine men’s support group that helps men. Hence they try to damage or destroy the genuine men’s groups.
5) This problem is more severe in North India, especially the city of Delhi and parts of Uttar Pradesh.

SIFF’s policy is to maintain safe distance from these negative elements and use formal legal means to keep ourselves safe from these abusive trolls and destructive elements. SIFF also periodically removes any member or volunteer, who attempt to join these elements or who seek monetary benefits for harming SIFF’s ecosystem.

It is getting really expensive to keep any support group like SIFF safe from such attacks. These enemies of the movement, who fool people by being fake men’s activists, are very determined and they are extremely vicious, when it comes to their goals of acquiring funds/money, businesses, fame, attention or awards.

Toxic MRAs:
Toxic MRAs are the Men’s Rights Activists who become toxic and harmful for men’s movement. They are like cancerous cells that destroy other cells of a body. If they are not contained, then they spread the cancer all around the movement and do massive damage.

Harm caused by Individual MRAs:

Men’s Activists can do activism in social media as a big team or they can do it by being an individual, being not part of any NGO or Men’s Support group. While most individual men’s activists are selfless and generous, however many such individual MRAs indulge in highly disruptive and harmful behavior. An individual activists is no match for the work that a Men’s NGO or Men’s Support group does. This often creates jealously in some of these individual activists and then they disrupt or try to harm men’s NGOs by abusing, defaming them in social media.

Needless to say, almost all female men’s activists are individual activists. They do not remain as a part of any NGO for long. Historically, female men’s activists have done more harm than good to men’s movement in India. They have indulged in cat fights with one another. Often, they tried to drag other men’s activists into these cat fights. Being small in number, these female men’s activists get undue attention in social media for any minor work they do. They bask on enormous gynocentric mindset that exists in Indian social media space and from time to time try to harm the men’s movement to get awards from Lawyers/Former Judges/Media/Government. Many of them also secretly collaborate with feminists, egalitarians and other gynocentric forces in exchange of damage to men’s movement. In crucial periods of time, some of these female activists sell out to feminist demands or surrender terms to feminists. So, a potential big win for the movement gets converted into a major loss.

What are basic traits of Toxic MRAs:

1) They most often operate in small groups inside the men’s movement.
2) They specifically target and try to bully other MRAs with a motive to disrupt their activities.
3) At a sophisticated levels, they mislead and poison minds of new male victims with their lies or by spreading gossip about some other MRAs or Men’s NGOs.
4) Toxic MRAs are often thrown out of bigger Men’s NGOs as other MRAs stop tolerating their aggression and nuisance.
5) Once thrown out, these toxic MRAs play victim in front of others in social media (Facebook/Twitter etc) hoping to get sympathy from new male victims.
6) A toxic MRA is generally worse than a 498a wife or brother/father of 498a wife. He will shout, abuse and defame his opponents in social media just like a 498a wife or her family.
7) Female MRAs can be toxic too. This can happen due to their frustration in inability to use their sexual appeal to control the men of men’s movement.
8) Toxic female MRAs work along with small gangs of male MRAs. They also spread gossip and false information in the movement.
9) Toxic MRAs thrive on curiosity of male victims for new information or gossip.

6) Often toxic MRAs work closely with lawyers behind the doors. That is how they aim to make money.
7) Some toxic MRAs do not attack other MRAs or Men’s NGOs directly. They harbor other Toxic MRAs in WhatsApp groups. Toxic MRAs who already made money in men’s movement sometimes pay money or offer some privileges to toxic MRAs to create nuisance. Often toxic female MRAs are paid to abuse others.

8) Toxic behaviour can increase when a MRA gets more followers or he gets promoted in the movement. This suddenly boosts his ego and he then starts kicking others.

Why some MRAs are Toxic?

1) Some MRAs are toxic from the beginning. They are by nature quarrelsome because of their arrogance and quarrelsome nature.
2) However many toxic MRAs also show this behavior after a certain period of time.
3) One of the motives behind their toxic behavior is to compensate for their inferiority complex and their failure in their life.
4) Many Toxic MRAs have greed for power and money in the movement. They want to be powerful quickly due to their over confidence.
5) Some of them are after money. They think, they can become rich by making money by using male victims. When big Men’s NGOs do not pander to them, then they think of causing harm to Men’s NGOs so that their path to make money becomes clear.

How to contain damage by this cancer to Men’s Movement?

1) Never read or spread gossip. You may be under stress and u may feel like reading gossip. Just question the motive of the person spreading gossip.
2) Learn to identify trolls. Toxic MRAs are often trolls.
3) Many toxic MRAs abuse one or other men’s groups without minding their own business. They often do this even while talking about importance of unity.
4) Toxic MRAs often appear like rebels and some of them may even inspire you with their rhetoric or slogans. You have to look at their abusive nature.
5) Never be friendly with a toxic MRA. If your MRA friend turns out to be toxic, just cut relationship with him. It is not because he is a bad friend, it is because he will misuse your friendship with him to cause more harm to other MRAs.
6) Try to find out the number of years an abusive toxic MRA is in the movement. Most toxic MRAs are in the movement for short duration of time. They cause trouble and then they vanish.
7) Some lawyers sometimes employ toxic MRAs. So, be careful when you see a lawyer in a MRA group.
8) Toxic people are highly jealous. They do not believe in live and let others live. Identify them and remain away from them.
9) Never talk of unity with toxic or quarrelsome MRAs. Because, toxic MRAs misuse any coalition or big NGO to rapidly spread their toxicity.
10) You will see abusive or defaming patterns in toxic MRAs.
11) Remember: if you do not avoid toxic MRAs, but yourself may become toxic too.
12) Toxic MRAs infect other good MRAs.
13) When you start turning toxic, you will start enjoying abuse of other MRAs. You will enjoy abuse of both feminists and MRAs. You will start liking conflicts. This is the warning sign.

Impact of Toxic MRAs on the Movement:

Some Toxic MRAs may make the movement grow on short run with their shark like behaviour. After that temporary growth, the movement crashes. Because of Toxic MRAs, Men’s NGOs stop growing as the team work among MRAs becomes weak.

Toxic MRAs spread distrust in the men’s movement. As a result, many good MRAs are also not trusted by other MRAs. It becomes difficult for good MRAs to build their credibility in the movement. This also makes it difficult to plan or execute any new initiative to change the laws.